The Gifts of Stress, Part 3 of 3

This is the third and final installment of my equation on how to get to the gifts of your stress – that equation again is: 

Identification of your stress + the de-stress mindfulness skills = the gifts of stress

In the first blog, we talked about identifying what’s stressing you out by focusing on your thoughts when you feel tense and nervous. The second part of the equation was how to use the de-stress skills to reduce that stress.

In today’s installment, you’ll learn how to see your stress in a new light to create a new perspective and find all the gifts your stress has to offer.

Recently, I was able to turn a worry into wonder and find a new perspective on a stressor. I’m looking for a space to host some groups. My lease is coming up on my current office, and I want to find a private office that also has a conference room or a large group room. I identified my stress as my need to find space before my current lease expired.

 Walking around the Denton square with the intent to check for vacancies at a particular office building, I notice a woman carrying books, a box, and an artificial human spine.  When fumbling for her keys, she drops the spine. Naturally, as the good, trusty citizen that I am, I pick it up and follow her inside. We chat about what she was doing with this spine, and how lucky she was that it wasn’t a real one when she dropped it at her door.

She tells me she had a booth at an event from where she just returned and that she had just turned 50. She said turning half a century old changed her life and inspired her to empower women. I also shared how I empower women in the second half of life to be open to what’s next.

She then shared that the event she had just come from had some office space available. What’s more, the chiropractor she worked for had just created a conference space next to his office. Talk about kismet!

What de-stress skill did I use to get through this stress? I took a walk. Walking is my de-stress skill of choice because when I can walk and be in the moment, I can often come up with a plan, or a solution to a problem I have – at least a first step that will propel me closer to my goal. I focus on what I can do about my problem when I am in the moment of walking – which is what happens when you use any mindfulness skill – you are in the present, where there is no regret about the past, or worry about the future, and you open the door to discovery. Being in the moment allows you the state of mind to be open to new experiences and a new perspective.

This leads me into the third part of the equation - the gifts of stress. The gift from that worry and stress that I would not be able to find a new space, actually turned to sheer wonder, amazement,  joy, and gratitude. I met this interesting woman with whom I had much in common - she was 50 (I was 50 once) and we both shared a passion for empowering women. And to top it off, I learned of a possible space to host groups.

All too often we look at our lives as one stressful event after another. If we get too many of those stressful events occurring all at once, we can get overwhelmed. One thing we know for sure, we can’t get rid of all our stress - it is a part of life. 

Yet, we can look at our stress differently. Instead of looking at those daily events as stress-filled, what if you looked at them as a series of life events or experiences? When you can look at your life as a series of events, or happenings, and simply part of your journey, then you can feel the gratitude of each moment.

Ask yourself - how can I be open to viewing this stressor as part of my journey, so I can appreciate what I have rather than what I’m lacking?

That is one way to turn your worry into wonder. The possibilities of different perspectives on your stress are endless. There is joy, courage, wonder, gratitude, fun, forgiveness…

I’d love to hear your story of how you found the gift or gifts of your stress. Feel free to email me at sue@suelegacy.com.